Boy Meets…Boy

How Dan and I met was honestly a pretty typical boy meets girl... Wait that's not right, there's no girl just two boys one living in Denver another visiting for a ski trip. I had been away for a week and was really just looking for something to do to get a bit of time away from my family. It's not that I don't like my family, but not sharing space with them is often very nice, especially after a week in hotel rooms.

In an attempt to get away for a bit, I was constantly looking for ways to meet people and had recently also decided I was open to dating either a girl or a guy with no particular preference. The dating a guy part did kind of have one advantage over dating a girl, it was a new revelation, as with most new things they are shinier and more exciting. Being that I was in a new place where no one knew me, I definitely shifted my focus towards guys that caught my eye rather than girls.

I have a pretty specific type: whether it's a guy or a girl, they all tend to look surprisingly similar with the exception of a few outliers. Dan at the time was very much that type other than a really awful goatee which thankfully didn't stick around for long. I'm not sure if we would have survived it otherwise 😂. It's kinda funny how the smallest things might have steered you away from one another in the early days before you develop a stronger relationship. If there was an equally lean, tan guy without a goatee that night, Dan and I may never have happened.

After our first introductions, Dan and I got to talking about life, relationships, and just about anything else that came to mind. I know this may disappoint many of you but there was no hot and steamy chance encounter that kicked off our meeting one another. It's not that I wouldn't have been up for that or that it couldn't have happened that way. Looks are what initially brought us together so a hot night could have been the start but maybe that would have ruined it. Quick rant: Looks aren't everything but personality isn't everything either, how you care for your body and appearance is very much an indication of your personality they are intertwined.

In the beginning we just had a lot to talk about even after I left Denver. We were really just friends or I suppose more like penpals. Early on I tried to make it more than just penpals but Dan was constantly trying to write me off as just another guy looking for a hookup. We just stayed friends and talked about everything and I was happy with that. We would talk about dates we went on with other people a lot too. It was nice to have a person to talk freely about everything with.

The penpal thing started to break down though at some point Dan started to become irritated if I talked about dates I went on. After Dan constantly turned down any advances I made in the beginning I had just accepted we were friends. Now Dan was suddenly not okay with being friends. It was strange and he was becoming more distant and any talk about hookups, dates, or people I liked just made him more distant.

At the point when we started to barely talk at all I realized the Dan who refused to treat our friendship as a potential love interest in the beginning had become emotionally attached. I wanted us to be more and apparently he did as well even if he was denying it. At this point we both started making advances and to my surprise he started to respond more favorably 😁. Then just as things seemed to be improving Dan started dating someone and started ignoring me.

I was okay with just being friends but cutting me out after we had shared everything seemed unfair. Being the stubborn person that I am, I wasn't letting this go so I kept pressing the issue right up until he really pissed me off. I was living in NYC at this time. Dan came to visit NYC but didn't tell me and when I called him out on not visiting me he refused to meet up.

I had given up at this point and was done trying to connect with someone who isn't interested in even being friends. I was always taught growing up that you should marry your best friend, although I don't think my parents meant even if it's a guy. The idea that we couldn't even be friends completely removed any idea of Dan being a love interest. To top it off he was dating someone and kinda hiding it, which was odd since I thought we shared everything.

When I stopped caring and pushing to stay in touch Dan must have missed me because he was suddenly interested in talking with me again. I'm not sure why but I didn't stay mad or hold a grudge. I just accepted it and we kept talking(I might have teased him just a little). Eventually I was able to convince him to finally come visit me in Boston where I was living in a hotel on an extended business trip. After that trip the relationship began although with a pretty rocky start.